The power of listening, the cornerstone of effective communication

MAGGIE MZUMARA

Many of us proudly beat our chests, convinced that we are good listeners.

After all, what could possibly be difficult about listening?

We have been doing it all our li lives – how could we not be good at it?

Well, newsflash dear reader, chances are you are not as good at listening as you think.

Listening is the cornerstone of effective communication.

But first, it is important to understand that good listening is not a passive act – far from it.

It is an active process that requires attention, focus and dedication.

In today’s fast-paced world, distractions are everywhere, making it challenging to effectively listen to others.

The challenge of listening in a distracted world

With the constant ping of notifications from our numerous electronic gadgets, the allure of social media, the heavy work loads and the temptation of multi-tasking, as well as general pressures from life and living; it is easy to get sidetracked and struggle to truly listen to others.

Whether it is a conversation with a family member, a work colleague or a friend, distractions can derail our attention and make it challenging to focus on the person speaking.

Signs You Are Not Listening as Well as You Think

1. You find yourself checking your phone or watch frequently.
2. You are thinking about your response while the other person is still speaking.
3. You are easily distracted by your surroundings or internal thoughts.
4. You often ask people to repeat themselves or clarify what they said.
5. You tend to interrupt or finish people’s sentences for them.

How to tell If You are listening as well as you should

1. The other person feels heard and understood.
2. You are able to recall important details from the conversation.
3. You are able to ask insightful and relevant questions.
4. The conversation flows smoothly, and both parties feel engaged.
5. You are able to resolve conflicts and misunderstandings effectively.

Tips for Improving Your Listening Skills

If you are to be an effective communicator, it is critical that you improve your listening skills.  Below are some tips on how to do that.

1. Give the speaker your full attention: Make eye contact, put away distractions, and focus on the speaker.
2. Use verbal and nonverbal cues: Use nods, head tilts, and verbal affirmations to show you’re engaged.
3. Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness can help you stay present and focused on the conversation.
4. Avoid interrupting: Let the speaker finish their thoughts before responding.
5. Paraphrase and summarise: Repeat back what you’ve understood from the conversation to ensure clarity.
6. Ask open-ended questions: Encourage the speaker to share more by asking open-ended questions.
7. Practice active listening in daily conversations: Make an effort to listen actively in all your conversations, not just important ones.

Benefits of Good Listening Skills

There are numerous benefits to be derived from good listening.  Some of them are listed below.

1. Stronger relationships: Good listening skills can help build trust, understanding, and stronger relationships.
2. Improved communication: Good listening skills can help prevent misunderstandings and miscommunications.
3. Increased empathy: Good listening skills can help you understand others’ perspectives and feelings.
4. Better conflict resolution: Good listening skills can help you resolve conflicts more effectively.

By prioritising listening and working to improve your listening skills, you can communicate more effectively and navigate the challenges of a distracted world with greater ease. This goes a long way in helping build stronger relationships. All the best, dear reader, in your various acts of listening. Stay steeped in the present.

*Maggie Mzumara is a Communication and Media Strategist; Corporate Trainer, Transformational Speaker and Leadership Consultant. She writes here in her personal capacity, and the views expressed do not reflect those of the organisations she is affiliated with. She can be reached at maggiemzumara@yahoo.ie